I grew up on a reservation but my highschool was still about 80% white… rural white (screw it, we’re rednecks OK?! i guess it only follows that if your skin is red your neck will be…) and homophobia is the rule there.

this “man’s man” idea seems to be a part of both hip-hop and metal cultures. (much to the chagrine of both sets of fans, i imagine). you nailed it when you said that its not for lack of intimacy, just this bizarre need for sexual safety. that safety is most easily found in death.

couple examples: i go home for a funeral of a friend of mine who died in a tragic ATV accident. i see some of the hardest sumsabitches ive ever known, weeping and holding each other for support over somebody who they would NEVER have told how they really felt about him while he was alive. im guessing this experience isnt 100% unique.

Dimebag Darrel (lead guitar, Pantera, death of dimebag is to metal as death of biggy/pac is to hip-hop, or something similar anyway) gets shot at a show in 2004. suddenly the baddest of the baddest baddasses of metal are penning tributes.

James Lynn Strait, lead singer of Snot, dies in a car accident in 98, Sevendust’s lead singer Lajon Witherspoon contributes a truly heartfelt song “Angel’s Son” to his tribute album. (sevendust is to metal as eminem is to hip-hop, though i would argue that sevendust has much more credibility amongst metal fans than em has amongst hip-hop fans) theres other songs on that album by like incubus and korn but i only remember this one.

all this is acceptable, but say this to a dude who is still breathing and we have to do the “no homo” (pronounced: im not a queer or nuthin, or im not gay but… to metal fans) thing too.

similar to hip-hop, metal will make exceptions for those bold enough to come clean (dont start…). Rob Halford of Judas Priest is the clearest example. As i understand it, it was known when they started in the 70s that he was gay, so i dont think many were shocked when he came out in the late 90s and i really dont think he lost too many fans. but he also had like 20 years worth of cred…

point is, this phenom isnt at all unique to black folks or even hip-hop culture. i think it mostly has to do with religion and education. think about it, the archtypes for both cultures are not exactly the most educated and enlightened cats on earth, and they typically have at least a childhood connection to one of the big 3 religions. none of which are particularly accepting of homosexuality.

i know this is “blackatmichigan”. but the brothas arent alone on this one. how do we reconcile this? i say fuck what they know, if i see one of my bros from way back, hes getting a hug (and not one of those ones where you pat them really hard so its like your hugging and hitting them at the same time either) and aint sayin “no homo” afterwords either. and ill try to stop cringing when i see 2 dudes kiss (can i still cringe when a dude kisses an ugly girl? or 2 ugly girls kiss? work with me here)

-andy chosa

Hip Hop is homophobic but is willing to make exceptions. For example Omar (from The Wire) and Lil’ Wayne. The rule seems to be the more up front you are about it, without beating around the bush (no pun intended), the more accepted you will be.